Chapter 11
In the days that followed, I stopped going out to play and threw myself into
studying.
I suddenly understood what Daniel Collins meant.
Studying is how we grant ourselves the right to choose our lives.
I started getting up even earlier and going to bed even later.
I would get up at 5am every day and memorize 100 words before going to morning study hall.
I took notes in class and reviewed them during breaks.
I no longer nap during lunch breaks. Instead, I close my eyes and silently recite
what I’ve recently learned, while also giving my eyes a rest.
After school in the evenings, I walk home to get some exercise. I listen to English
audio with headphones, and Daniel tutors me for two to three hours. After he
leaves, I review on my own for another hour.
Before going to bed, I review everything I learned that day one more time. If there’s anything I can’t remember, I immediately get up and check until I have it all
sorted out before sleeping.
Even in my dreams, I’m studying. I’ve even jolted awake in the middle of the nig to suddenly look up a knowledge point..
At first, my mom was thrilled to see my huge progress. She bragged about it
everywhere and made me all sorts of delicious food at home.
But now she’s getting scared. Every day at meals, she frets and tries to persuade.
me:
“Emily, take a break. What if you wear yourself out?”
But I can’t rest. As soon as I do, I’m filled with a deep sense of guilt. Even when I go to the bathroom, I wonder what Natalie is doing.
Is she studying?
If so, haven’t I fallen a step behind her again?
The days pass by like this. Sometimes I even lose track of time.
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I can only watch as my grades rise at an alarming rate.
Third monthly exam 16th place.
Fourth monthly exam – 8th place.
By the fifth monthly exam, I even beat out Jason and lost to Natalie by only a three
point margin.
When the grades came out, Jason was stunned.
He stared at his test paper in disbelief, checking the scores over and over before plopping down in his seat.
I saw him glance back at me, eyes full of shock and incredulity.
I avoided his gaze and focused on reviewing my mistakes.
No one accuses me of cheating anymore.
All the students have gotten used to my improvement, because they can see how
hard I work.
But they’re still amazed every time grades are released. No one looks down on me now. Instead, they all come to me with questions and copy my answers and test
nan
papers.
I’ve become the “study god” in their eyes.
The teachers treat me like a treasure. I’m held up as a model case study and my perfect essays and exams are posted in the hallways.
I’ve gradually gotten used to all this and no longer feel proud. Now, there’s only one belief sustaining my nearly crazed efforts. Surpass Natalie and get into Harvard.
As I was leaving the school gates, Jason stopped me.
“Emily!”
He stood in front of me, eyes lacking their usual disdain.
In nature, the law is survival of the fittest. Humans are the same way.
Revering the strong is encoded in our DNA.
Jason no longer had the right to look down on me, nor did he dare to anymore.
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But I couldn’t be bothered to argue with him.
He was already the loser.
“Emily, you…you’re really impressive.” His expression was complex, as if he didn’t.
recognize me.
“It’s like you’ve become a different person.”
had no time to listen to his nonsense and said directly:
“Get to the point.”
Jason glanced at me and lowered his head.
“I hope you can call off the bet with Natalie. We’re all classmates, there’s no need
to make things so ugly. If this escalates, it won’t look good for you either. Can’t your just talk to her and let it go?”
I almost laughed at his shamelessness.
“Me? Why should I? Why don’t you tell her to come to me?”
“Natalie is rather…proud. She definitely won’t admit defeat. And you two don’t
have any deep grudges.”
“Besides, it’s because of us pushing you that you were able to improve so much. Can’t you just give in to her?”
He frowned at me, as if what he was saying made perfect sense.
Looking at Jason’s face, disgust welled up inside me.
What right did he have to make such a self–righteous request?
How could he have the nerve to say it?
I must have been blind to have ever liked him!
Gratitude? What gratitude!
If I should thank anyone, I only need to thank myself for working my ass off!
I snorted coldly and squinted at him.
“Who do you think you are?”
“You think you deserve my thanks? If you’re so bored, go find a factory job instead
of spouting nonsense!”
I started to leave but then realized something.
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I didn’t know if this was Jason’s own idea or if Natalie had gotten scared and sent
him to speak for her.
A malicious smile played at the corner of my mouth.
“Could it be that Natalie is afraid?”
“Go tell her, if she’s willing to kneel and apologize to me, I’ll be magnanimous and let her off the hook this once. How about it?”
Anger flashed in Jason’s eyes.
“You’ve gone too far, Emily. I’m giving you face by coming to talk to you. Don’t blame me for not giving you a chance when you lose and humiliate yourself!”
I laughed and lifted my head to stare steadily at Jason.
I said contemptuously:
“A loser like you thinks you can lecture me?”
“Come talk to me again when you’ve surpassed me.”
“You-!”
Jason was furious. He coldly spat out “unbelievable” before stalking off. Watching his retreating figure, I let out the breath I had been holding in my chest. Damn!
That felt good!
